Articles

Explaining Baggage

Explaining Baggage

A particular challenge of dating in and out of church circles is baggage. More specifically, deciding when and how to explain the particular baggage (meaning, your notable issues or challenges) you bring to the relationship. If you bring up your baggage too quickly, you could scare people off and repel others. Conversely, if you bring up issues too deep and late into a relationship—even after engagement or even marriage, the other person may feel you weren’t honest and open in the relationship.

2020-09-27 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Communication
Marriage and In-Laws

Marriage and In-Laws

One area of challenge for most couples are relationships with the in-laws. Why? Because the new mother and father-in-law are a part of the package of what you commit to in marriage, but they are not necessarily people you would seek out and befriend if they were not connected to your spouse. And how you navigate the relationship with your new extended family members will be important to the health and longevity of your marriage. This article will review ideas about in-laws to assist you for

2020-09-20 Randy Gilchrist Healthy relationships
Being Healthy

Being Healthy

It is hard to have a healthy, happy dating and married relationship if you yourself are not personally healthy. The goal of this article is to give you a review of several key elements to be personally healthy, happy, and ready to offer the best version of yourself to another. So, what are the important elements of yourself to work on? And how can you be personally healthy? Here are some ideas: Elements of Personal Health: Physical Health: basically, to be physically healthy involves giving

2020-09-14 Randy Gilchrist Health and fitness
Libido Problems in Marriage

Libido Problems in Marriage

In previous articles I have discussed sex life related topics for single members as an effort to help everyone in preparation for their future marriage. Why? Because sexual dissatisfaction and dysfunction is a common, damaging problem and challenge among married couples in the church. I have discussed the common topic and challenge of sexual hangups (https://www.ldsdimension.com/articles/sexual-hangups-in-marriage-182/), sexual dissatisfaction and dysfunction in marriage

2020-08-31 Randy Gilchrist Healthy relationships, Marriage preparation
Picking Well

Picking Well

Over the years I’ve noticed that there are 2 simple and basic requirements to a successful relationship. The first requirement is to pick well, the second is to nurture your relationship well from there. If you have picked well, the other person will most likely nurture you well in return. Implied in this rule of thumb is that when you do not pick well—when you pick a person with notable character flaws, problems, or issues, your efforts to keep the relationship healthy, happy, and committed

2020-08-23 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Healthy relationships
Applying the 7 Habits to Relationships

Applying the 7 Habits to Relationships

A landmark self-help book by renown BYU professor Stephen Covey is the classic work: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Regularly touted as one of the top 20 self-help books of all time, this remarkable work loosely and informally translates several useful and traditionally LDS principles into a user-friendly self-help form to promote what makes for healthy, happy, effective people. These principles relate to both the business world, relationships, and life in general. In today’s dating

2020-08-17 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Communication
Positive Relationship Role Models

Positive Relationship Role Models

One of the biggest challenges for relationships today is the lack of positive marriage and relationship role models. Too often we see friends, family, and coworkers complaining about their significant other, getting separations and divorces, and overall being unhappy. We see TV and movies showing the same things: arguing, contention, resentments, break ups, infidelity, and on and on. It is no wonder that people have largely lost faith and confidence in relationships and marriage success today.

2020-08-10 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Healthy relationships
Handling Rejection

Handling Rejection

One of the hardest aspects of the dating world is when you face rejection: someone deciding they are not interested in and do not want to date you (or no longer want to date you). It is very easy to take the rejection hard and take it personally. We often wonder why we were truly rejected. Because often the one rejected either gives no explanation (they “ghost” you), gives a false explanation, or only gives a partial explanation (where there is “more to the story”). Occasionally the rejecting

2020-08-03 Randy Gilchrist Dating
Is the Grass Greener?

Is the Grass Greener?

One of the benefits of technology today is the ease and convenience that it provides. Online dating and social media platforms allow for the opportunity for 24/7 access for an endless number of potential dating partners. However, this same convenience and unlimited quantity brings another modern problem that has never existed to this level before: the “grass is greener” effect. When one person seems nice, attractive, and friendly, etc., people wonder if they might be able to do even better if

2020-07-27 Randy Gilchrist
Are They Telling the Truth?

Are They Telling the Truth?

One big challenge in the dating world: figuring out if you can you trust that a person you are getting to know is telling the truth about themselves. To be fair, everyone is under a decent amount of pressure to put a good foot forward and show their best side in the dating arena. Unfortunately, deception, exaggeration, and straight out lying are common methods used in an attempt to impress others in the effort to find a new relationship. The problem is that if a potential dating partner is

2020-07-20 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Communication, Psychological health
Money and Compromise

Money and Compromise

Money is one of the touchier, more challenging subjects for couples and relationships. Complicating the issue is the somewhat mixed messages given on the subject. Some scriptures point out the dangers and even problems of money and a materialistic focus, whereas other scriptures emphasize providing adequately and getting out of debt as positive things. Here are some various scriptures on the subject that frame the pursuit of money in a rather negative light: For the love of money is the root

2020-07-06 Endre Szasz Marriage preparation, Conflict resolution, Finance
Comparing Looks

Comparing Looks

Whether you are male or female, looking good increases your dating stock immensely. Why? Because looking good increases romance, physical attraction, and sexual chemistry. The more people that are attracted to someone’s looks, the greater the options they will have to pick from in the dating pool. In short, looking good is important in the dating world. It is natural, instinctive, an important part of spark, connection, and giving/receiving affection. To deny the important role of looks in a

2020-06-29 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating, Psychological health
Marriage Quotes

Marriage Quotes

Periodically in my articles I like to highlight quotes that modern prophets/official church sources have to say about important and relevant topics, especially relationships and marriage related topics. In this article I want to share some clear, straight forward quotes on marriage that I hope they can be useful and informative. The main idea is that in spite of worldly attitudes, marriage is still ideal, is important to strive for, and is ordained of God. Please continue to pursue this

2020-06-22 Randy Gilchrist Marriage preparation
Video Games: The Dilemma

Video Games: The Dilemma

Video games come in numerous formats: Nintendo, Play Station, and X-Box. There are also PC and cell phone games as well. These games are usually played online today with fellow players from all around the world. Such games usually have no end and just build level by level, round by round. Many are “shoot ‘em up games”, others are more strategy oriented. Most cater to boys and men, although many girls and women play them too. However, on average women usually spend more time on social media

2020-06-15 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Healthy relationships
Overcoming a Negative Attitude

Overcoming a Negative Attitude

After dating and relationship problems or failures, it is understandable to develop a negative attitude towards relationships and the opposite sex. The self-protective part of us inside can promote a cynical, avoidant attitude to lessen the chance of more pain and disappointment. The problem is that when we develop a negative attitude like this, we also lose out on the chance for relationship opportunities and success. Loneliness becomes inevitable. Plus, who wants to feel negative, angry, or

2020-06-07 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Healthy relationships
Positive Ideas About Femininity

Positive Ideas About Femininity

In Isaiah 5:20-24 a problem is described that will exist in the latter days: “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! Woe unto them that are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight! Woe unto them that are mighty to drink wine, and men of strength to mingle strong drink: Which justify the wicked for reward, and take away the righteousness of the righteous from him!

2020-06-01 Randy Gilchrist Understanding women, Spirituality