Is it more difficult to be a single member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints than a married member? Maybe. I would say, that depends. If married members are in unhappy and unhealthy marriages—even abusive marriages—then no. Their scenario is often harder or worse. Nevertheless, I agree that there are special challenges and difficulties for single members in the church. This includes feeling treated as lesser members sometimes, not being included in certain callings and activities, and dealing with the burden of overall stigma of not being in the ideal family unit: husband, wife, kids.
While I don’t have all of the answers for dealing with the challenge of treatment as single members here, I do have 1 suggestion. I recommend working to get and keep your temple recommend and then attending the temple on a regular basis. No matter where you are at spiritually, begin working for this now. Attending the temple regularly will give you special spiritual strength, blessing, understanding, support, and comfort. In this article I am going to review a few encouraging quotes from general authorities to help direct you towards regular temple attendance for the blessings that await you.
The Empowerment from Regular Temple Attendance:
“In the temple, the precious plan of God is taught. It is in the temple that eternal covenants are made. The temple lifts us, exalts us, stands as a beacon for all to see, and points us toward celestial glory. It is the house of God. All that occurs within the walls of the temple is uplifting and ennobling.
“As we touch the temple and love the temple, our lives will reflect our faith. As we go to the holy house, as we remember the covenants we make therein, we will be able to bear every trial and overcome each temptation. The temple provides purpose for our lives. It brings peace to our souls—not the peace provided by men but the peace promised by the Son of God when He said, “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”
--Thomas S. Monson, Blessings of the Temple, October 2010
As a house of learning, the temple becomes “a school of instruction in the sweet and sacred things of God.” Here we learn about “the odyssey of man’s eternal journey from premortal existence through this life to the life beyond.”
--Russell M. Nelson, Prepare for Blessing of the Temple, April 2003
“For ordinance workers in the Provo Utah Temple and throughout the world, serving is an act of love.
“My ability to love has increased,” says Toni. “As a temple worker, wherever I am or whatever I am doing in the temple, I have the ability and responsibility to reflect the love of the Savior. As I practice doing that in the temple, I am better able to reflect on His love outside of the temple.” All who participate in temple work reflect the love of the Savior by helping extend the blessings of the gospel to all of Heavenly Father’s children.
--Sara D. Smith, Temple Service and Unexpected Blessings, April 2012
“As we go to the temple, as we remember the covenants we make there, we will be better able to overcome [our] temptations and to bear our trials. In the temple we can find peace.
“The blessings of the temple are priceless. One for which I am grateful every day of my life is that which my beloved wife, Frances, and I received as we knelt at a sacred altar and made covenants binding us together for all eternity. There is no blessing more precious to me than the peace and comfort I receive from the knowledge I have that she and I will be together again.
“May our Heavenly Father bless us that we may have the spirit of temple worship, that we may be obedient to His commandments, and that we may follow carefully the steps of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.”
--President Thomas S. Monson, “Blessings of the Temple,” Ensign, May 2015
“Come to the temples worthily and regularly. Not only do you bless those who are deceased, but you may freely partake of the promised personal revelation that may bless your life with power, knowledge, light, beauty, and truth from on high, which will guide you and your posterity to eternal life. What person would not want these blessings, as expressed by the Prophet Joseph Smith at the dedication of the Kirtland Temple. He said: ‘We ask thee, Holy Father, that thy servants may go forth from this house armed with thy power, and that thy name may be upon them, and thy glory be round about them, and thine angels have charge over them.’ (D&C 109:22.)
-- David B. Haight, Rejoice in the Blessings of the Temple, Ensign, December 2002
“Every man or woman who goes to the temple comes out of that building a better man or woman than he or she was when entering into it. That’s something that’s remarkable that happens with all of us. … Do you have problems and concerns and worries? Do you want for peace in your heart and an opportunity to commune with the Lord and meditate upon His way? Go to the house of the Lord and there feel of His Spirit and commune with Him and you will know a peace that you will find nowhere else”
--President Gordon B. Hinckley, Rejoice in the Blessings of the Temple, Ensign, December 2002
There are many positive quotes from general authorities reviewing the many countless blessing of temple attendance. These are just a few. By attending the temple regularly, you too will enjoy all of these blessings. These blessings will help you better navigate membership as a single member, as well as prepare you for a future marriage, whenever that works out for you in the future. If you currently do not have a temple recommend, please meet with your bishop now and create a path and plan to get there. You will be very glad you did. If you feel this is impossible somehow, that is even more of a reason to meet with the bishop and find out what is needed. The temple is for all—including you. The time to make this happen in now. And remember that “…neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.”—1 Corinthians 11:1.
P.S. If you have any questions, comments, or a future article request for me, feel free to contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org
About the author
Hello, my name is Dr. Randy Gilchrist (aka "Dr. G"). I am a licensed clinical psychologist, a licensed marriage & family therapist, and a certified hypnotherapist in private practice in Roseville, CA (www.dr-rg.com), practicing since 1997. Also, I am happily married in the temple (Manti) since 1996 and have 4 sons. I am a volunteer writer and contributor to LDS Dimension. I use my training, education, and experience to share insights with LDS Dimension on all things of interest to the LDS dating community. Please read my articles and columns on this site to assist you in your online dating journey. Also, to be considered for an answer in a future Q and A column, please email me your dating/relationship oriented questions to email@example.com. Finally, I also offer a powerful, effective worldwide custom hypnosis recording service just for LDS Dimension members for weight loss, pornography, and many other issues of concern to those in the LDS dating community (please learn more now at www.dr-rg.com/lds; email me questions to firstname.lastname@example.org).