Dating

Being Hopeful in Single Life

Being Hopeful in Single Life

There are several ways to be single. You can be a person who has never been married. You can have had one or more divorces. Or you can be a widow/widower. Whatever your particular circumstance, most adult members of the church will be single at some point of their lives. The church recently revealed that for the first time ever, more adult church members are single than married—just over 50%. An April, 2021 Deseret News article stated the following: “…The majority of adult church members are

2021-11-28 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Marriage preparation
Alarming Worldly Trends

Alarming Worldly Trends

In the New Testament, Christ tells his disciples to be “in the world” but not “of the world (John 19:14-16). That has become especially difficult today, but it’s not impossible. In the latter days, many troublesome times were prophesied of that we are now living in and seeing the fulfillment of: Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils; Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their

2021-11-14 Randy Gilchrist Dating
Going Back to the Temple:  Addressing and Eliminating Excuses

Going Back to the Temple: Addressing and Eliminating Excuses

As a single member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, it would be well worth your while to have a current temple recommend and regularly attend to the temple. Regular temple attendance would bless you with having the Spirit more often, which will help you be happy now and prepare you spiritually for your future marriage. Temple attendance will also help ease your emotional pains and scars from the past. Finally, going to the temple regularly will remind you of the eternal

2021-10-16 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Spirituality
Being A Commitment-Oriented Person

Being A Commitment-Oriented Person

In the 2020s with both members and non-members of the church alike, commitment in relationships and marriage has become weak and strained. And harder to find and maintain than previous generations. While there are numerous societal shifts and factors that have contributed to this development, a primary contributor to this problem is technology and the immediate gratification that comes from it. With Facebook, Instagram, Match, Tinder, You Tube, Tik Tok, online gaming, etc., people and

2021-10-09 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Healthy relationships, Communication
Online Dating—Picking a Winner

Online Dating—Picking a Winner

Online dating today is more than just the traditional online dating websites. There are also dating apps, social media forums, video games, and many other ways to meet and connect online. In most social sites online, a person has a profile of some kind that possesses valuable information that can help you learn whether or not they would make for a good pick to date and relationship partner. And what the profile doesn’t show, you can then tactfully research and inquire about before meeting. In

2021-10-03 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Marriage preparation
Catfishing: Beware of Scammers Online

Catfishing: Beware of Scammers Online

If social media and online dating sites/apps aren’t the main way people are meeting in the 2020s, they soon will be. Online connections are becoming more and more mainstream. The common way that people today meet and interact. And while some people date and may even marry those they meet online, most will not lead to that result, just like in real life. Also, similar to real life, there are scammers out there. Frauds. Players. Charlatans. You know, those who will do a bait and switch—pretend to

2021-09-26 Randy Gilchrist Dating
Making a Good Dating Profile

Making a Good Dating Profile

In the 2020s and beyond, online dating is only getting bigger and bigger. Time limitations, geography, and many other challenges have made the convenience, flexibility, and quantity of options have helped make online dating more popular than ever. What was once seen as “desperate” is now common, acceptable, and destigmatized. In short, online dating is here to stay. There are traditional online dating websites, dating apps, and online forums and groups to choose from. Whatever your choice of

2021-09-19 Randy Gilchrist Dating
To Move or Not to Move?

To Move or Not to Move?

One tough reality for today’s single church members with dating: do they choose to move to an area with better dating opportunities or do they stay put and do the best they can where they are? The answer to this question is completely arbitrary and up to you. However, this article will review some possible challenges to moving that need to be overcome to hopefully help with your decision. The fact is that some areas have many more single members than others—namely the bigger metros in Utah

2021-06-14 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Marriage preparation
Don’t Be a Downer

Don’t Be a Downer

In the early 2000s, Saturday Night Live ran a sketch starring Rachel Dratch as “Debbie Downer”. Each sketch basically had the same arrangement: a collection of people were gathered together for a fun, special occasion, such as going to Disney World, a Thanksgiving dinner, a wedding reception, etc. While everyone else is working to have a good time, Debbie still manages to take every positive thing going on and find the negative in it. It wears very thin, very quickly with everyone else. By the

2021-05-14 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Communication
Keeping an Eternal Perspective on Marriage

Keeping an Eternal Perspective on Marriage

In our lives as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, we have often been told that we need to “keep an eternal perspective on things”. But what does “keeping an eternal perspective” mean? It means thinking of and approaching every notable circumstance/decision in this life with a consideration of how our approach to it will matter one way or the other both now and in the next life. In the eternities. After the days of our mortal existence have ended. The idea and hope is

2021-04-25 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Spirituality
Why We Pick Who We Pick

Why We Pick Who We Pick

There is a lot of pressure regarding who we pick to marry as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Not only do we have a very marriage and family centered church, but temple marriages are, ideally, supposed to last forever when we are sealed together. In fact, a famous quote by Elder Bruce R. McConkie states the following: “The most important single thing that any Latter-day Saint ever does in this world is to marry the right person, in the right place, by the right

2021-04-17 Randy Gilchrist Dating
Overcoming Selfishness

Overcoming Selfishness

To be “selfish” is to be overly focused on one’s own wants, needs, feelings, and desires, regardless of how such actions or attitudes may harm or effect another. To be selfish is to do what we feel like doing and not doing what we don’t feel like doing—without consideration for other people taken into account. Therefore, it is no surprise that selfishness erodes and can eventually destroy relationships and marriages. President Gordon B. Hinkley has emphasized fidelity in marriage and well as

2021-04-05 Shawn Gordon Dating, Psychological health
The Psychology of Color in Fashion Choice

The Psychology of Color in Fashion Choice

When going out on a date, the fashion choice you select sends multiple messages to the other person. One message comes from the color of clothing you wear. Different color choices convey different meanings, set different moods, or create different impressions. In this article, a brief review will be given of the different messages sent out by different colors in the outfits you may choose to wear. Now, the colors you wear probably won’t be as important as, say, how you communicate with the

2021-03-29 Randy Gilchrist Dating
Temptations to Warn Others

Temptations to Warn Others

Some people have an ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife that was very troublesome in their past relationship together. Perhaps they were cheaters. Maybe the were physically, emotionally, and/or psychologically abusive. They may have been neglectful or even possessed a personality disorder. Many exes are exes for a reason: because they have notable problems that led to or at least contributed to the demise of your previous relationship together. However that relationship ended, perhaps you can

2021-03-21 Randy Gilchrist Dating
A Naturally Excellent Woman

A Naturally Excellent Woman

Over the years, clients have occasionally asked me who they think represents an ideal woman in the movies. Women have also sometimes asked me who I think an ideal woman is to strive to be like in a relationship and who represents the ideal. Men have also sometimes asked if an ideal woman exists in the movies as well to help them know what to look for and who to choose. I have thought about it and out of all of the women I have seen in the movies, one woman to me represents the ideal woman, wife

2021-02-22 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating
Social Anxiety: A Problem to Manage

Social Anxiety: A Problem to Manage

Social anxiety is a common and troubling challenge among most people, especially single members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. It is often a misunderstood, frustrating issue. Therefore, the purpose of this article is to give a brief introduction to the disorder, as well as offer some ideas and suggestions to help you lessen and control this problem. Social Anxiety can be defined as follows: The defining feature of social anxiety disorder, also called social phobia, is

2021-02-14 Randy Gilchrist Dating, Psychological health