Understanding women

Attraction on Display: Danny and Sandy

Attraction on Display: Danny and Sandy

In the classic 1978 movie “Grease”, the main characters showcase what powerful male and female attraction is all about. That is mainly why this musical is still highly popular all these decades later. Danny Zuko (played by John Travolta) and Sandra “Sandy” Dee (played by Olivia Newton John) not only have a strong attraction and chemistry together, but they also demonstrate the classic, powerful traits of male and female attraction in general. Being aware of these traits can illustrate and

2021-08-30 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women
What is Attractive to Women?

What is Attractive to Women?

What traits initially attract a woman to a man? What mainly leads her to be open to romantically dating a man in the beginning? What helps her to have butterflies and be drawn to him? What forces differentiate a guy from “just being a friend”, to someone she would consider dating and having a relationship with? These are important questions that men are curious about and women may not be fully and consciously aware of. In other words, what a woman learns from church and society that she

2021-08-22 Randy Gilchrist Understanding women
The Main Thing Women Want

The Main Thing Women Want

In one of my first articles for LDS Dimension/LDS Dating, I wrote an article titled, “What Women Want” (see: https://www.ldsdimension.com/articles/what-do-women-want-2/). This information and these ideas were based upon a combination of my training, education, and clinical experience as a psychologist with women, men, and couples. I’m sure my own personal experiences added to these ideas as well. In that original article, I stated that the main thing women want and need in a relationship—in my

2021-07-11 Shawn Gordon Understanding women
A Naturally Excellent Woman

A Naturally Excellent Woman

Over the years, clients have occasionally asked me who they think represents an ideal woman in the movies. Women have also sometimes asked me who I think an ideal woman is to strive to be like in a relationship and who represents the ideal. Men have also sometimes asked if an ideal woman exists in the movies as well to help them know what to look for and who to choose. I have thought about it and out of all of the women I have seen in the movies, one woman to me represents the ideal woman, wife

2021-02-22 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating
Comparing Looks

Comparing Looks

Whether you are male or female, looking good increases your dating stock immensely. Why? Because looking good increases romance, physical attraction, and sexual chemistry. The more people that are attracted to someone’s looks, the greater the options they will have to pick from in the dating pool. In short, looking good is important in the dating world. It is natural, instinctive, an important part of spark, connection, and giving/receiving affection. To deny the important role of looks in a

2020-06-29 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating, Psychological health
Positive Ideas About Femininity

Positive Ideas About Femininity

In Isaiah 5:20-24 a problem is described that will exist in the latter days: “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! Woe unto them that are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight! Woe unto them that are mighty to drink wine, and men of strength to mingle strong drink: Which justify the wicked for reward, and take away the righteousness of the righteous from him!

2020-06-01 Randy Gilchrist Understanding women, Spirituality
Common Complaints from Women

Common Complaints from Women

In last week’s article I made a list of some of the most common complaints from single men about women, heard over and over again during my years of doing therapy as a clinical psychologist. Most of these complaints were made by single male members of the church, and some were also common complaints made by non-member men as well. To show that I am willing to give equal time to both sides, I have also decided to make a list here showing the most common complaints single female members of the

2020-05-04 Randy Gilchrist Understanding women, Dating
Admiring the Opposite Sex

Admiring the Opposite Sex

In the 21st century the media and society often pit men and women against each other, as well as blur and confuse ideas about gender and gender differences. As a result, it is common for men and women today to possess an antagonism towards the opposite sex, as well as a confusion about gender and gender roles/traits. What effect does this antagonism and confusion have on dating and relationships? In short, a bad effect: it is very difficult to connect with and maintain a relationship with a

2020-04-06 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating
Different Ways Men and Women Communicate

Different Ways Men and Women Communicate

The number one most common complaint I hear from men and women in couples therapy is that they are having difficulties with communication and want to communicate better with each other. In fact, I can’t remember any couples therapy I have ever done with a couple that did not include some version of this same goal. In this article I will review some of the main common differences in the primary gendered ways and purposes (but not the only ways and purposes) men and women communicate, along with

2020-03-16 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Communication
When Others Warn

When Others Warn

One common occurrence that can be experienced as you get to know someone or begin dating is that some current or former friend, family member, or coworker of your partner has some warning for you about them. “Um, I just thought that you might like to know that he/she is/was/did______ (in the past)”, or “you might want to think twice about that person because_____”. Perhaps you are warned that your partner is abusive, neglectful, poor with money, had a bad temper, whatever. The advice may be to

2019-09-02 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating, Healthy relationships
Acting Attractive

Acting Attractive

Acting attractive on the outside with your looks, body language, facial expressions, words, actions…is it important to dating? Should it be important? Well, it is if you want to…attract someone to date you. An important rule of thumb: looking, acting, and sounding attractive on the outside gives you more initial dating opportunities--more often with more people. It creates spark and butterflies. Conversely, being a quality person on the inside and treating your partner well is what gives your

2018-09-24 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating
Antagonism Towards the Opposite Sex

Antagonism Towards the Opposite Sex

Man and woman were created for each other. Opposites. Compliments. Mutual supports. Different roles. Originally in Genesis, it says: “And the Lord God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed. And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the

2018-07-16 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating, Healthy relationships, Conflict resolution
When Are Advances Welcome?

When Are Advances Welcome?

by Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) One of the trickiest parts of being an LDS single (or a single in general) can be determining if a new love interest you are getting to know is in fact interested in return and welcome to your advances. Tricky because what may have been hoped to be romantic, exciting, and connective may actually be unwelcome advances. Even worse, you can come across as creepy, unwanted, and even harassing. So, how

2018-06-12 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating
Relationship Advice:  Where to Go (and Not Go)

Relationship Advice: Where to Go (and Not Go)

by Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) In the dating world—both as LDS and non-LDS singles, it is common and often good to look for new, quality relationship advice: what to do, what not to do, who to date, who not to date, how to proceed and progress, etc. Getting an outside opinion and outside information can be a smart thing. Otherwise if we keep simply trusting our own judgement and choosing the same kinds of people and going about

2018-02-22 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating
Valuing Femininity

Valuing Femininity

by Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) In today’s world, the media, society, and academics often create and perpetuate antagonism between the genders, especially from women towards men. That which is considered masculine is often promoted and sought after by women over men. Masculine traits have been deemed by society as the desirable traits for women to ascribe to, and feminine traits have been deemed the weak traits, and have been left

2018-01-08 Randy Gilchrist Understanding women
Feminism Versus Masculinity

Feminism Versus Masculinity

by Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) In 1995, the First Presidency released The Family: A Proclamation to the World, which included the following: All human beings—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and

2017-12-10 Randy Gilchrist Understanding men, Understanding women, Dating, Healthy relationships