Many times in the scriptures we are told to “endure to the end”. For instance, Christ told the Nephites, “Behold, I am the law, and the light. Look unto me, and endure to the end, and ye shall live; for unto him that endureth to the end will I give eternal life” (3 Nephi 15:9). So, what does that mean? From my understanding, this means staying active in church and being faithful to your baptismal covenants until you die. Keeping temple covenants too, where applicable. Keep active, keep having faith, and keep repenting until you are no longer living. Simple, but not easy. Is this directive the same when you are single versus married? Yes, all are to endure to end spiritually. But doing so single adds an extra dimension and is often more challenging than being married and having that additional connection and support. In this little article, some ideas are given to navigate these challenges and endure to the end as a single member.
Ways to Endure to the End:
*Keep Trying to Date and Have Relationships: If you would like to be married eternally, making regular efforts to date and have relationships throughout your life until the end is important, even if you never do have a temple marriage in mortality. Why? Because if you resign yourself to staying single and stop trying here in this life, there is a good chance that you will also be resigned to be single in the next life too and remain that way. This is because we learn in the scriptures that, “…that same sociality which exists among us here will exist among us there (in the next life), only it will be coupled with eternal glory, which glory we do not now enjoy” (Doctrine & Covenants 130:2). Therefore the traits—including social traits—we develop here in this life will follow us to the next life. Said another way, if we give up searching for a spouse in this life, that same attitude and approach we cultivate will continue to be our attitude there. And when we never choose eternal marriage in this life or the next, we can make it to the celestial kingdom, but only as a single person.
As we learn in Doctrine & Covenants 132:15-17, “Therefore, if a man marry him a wife in the world, and he marry her not by me nor by my word, and he covenant with her so long as he is in the world and she with him, their covenant and marriage are not of force when they are dead, and when they are out of the world; therefore, they are not bound by any law when they are out of the world. Therefore, when they are out of the world they neither marry nor are given in marriage; but are appointed angels in heaven, which angels are ministering servants, to minister for those who are worthy of a far more, and an exceeding, and an eternal weight of glory. For these angels did not abide my law; therefore, they cannot be enlarged, but remain separately and singly, without exaltation, in their saved condition, to all eternity; and from henceforth are not gods, but are angels of God forever and ever.” In other words, if we do not choose (or, from my understanding, want and strive to choose) a temple marriage in mortal life, that choice and attitude follows them to the next life. The result: remaining single and acting as servants to others who did choose an eternal marriage. So please keep trying and don’t give up striving for an eternal marriage in mortality.
*Keep Doing What You Need to Do Spiritually:
There are six basic things you can do to “stay on the straight and narrow path” and endure to the end:
--Pray: exercise faith, repent, offer thanks, and ask for help and support. Maintain and strengthen your personal relationship with Heavenly Father by regularly talking with him, as well as listening to his response by the Spirit.
--Read Scriptures: regularly read, watch, or listen to inspired materials. This mainly means the scriptures, but also general conference talks and other inspired materials from the general authorities and other inspired church members.
--Attend Church: go to the full 2 hours of church every week. In addition, attend other church activities and participate in whatever other ways available with church and church members.
--Fulfill your Calling(s): whatever your church calling, work to regularly and adequately fulfill your callings including ministering.
--Hold a Current Temple Recommend: be familiar with the temple recommend questions and be able to truly answer affirmatively to those questions. If you are not “temple worthy”, work towards getting that recommend and get it. No matter how hard it is or how long it takes.
--Attend the Temple: if you have a recommend, regularly go to the temple as possible, perhaps once a month.
Final Thoughts: Endure to the end. Always strive to find your eternal companion. If you do that, it will either happen in this life or the next. In addition, follow the other ways to remain active and involved in the church until the end of your life, as outlined above. Doing so is worth it. Eternal marriage is worth it and the way it was always meant to be. Because “…neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.”—1 Corinthians 11:11.
Dr. G
P.S. If you can questions, comments, or a future article request for me, feel free to contact me at drgilchrist@yahoo.com.
| 2020-12-21 | Randy Gilchrist | Dating, Spirituality |
About the author
Hello, my name is Dr. Randy Gilchrist (aka "Dr. G"). I am a licensed clinical psychologist, a licensed marriage & family therapist, and a certified hypnotherapist in private practice in Roseville, CA (www.dr-rg.com), practicing since 1997. Also, I am happily married in the temple (Manti) since 1996 and have 4 sons. I am a volunteer writer and contributor to LDS Dimension. I use my training, education, and experience to share insights with LDS Dimension on all things of interest to the LDS dating community. Please read my articles and columns on this site to assist you in your online dating journey. Also, to be considered for an answer in a future Q and A column, please email me your dating/relationship oriented questions to drgilchrist@yahoo.com. Finally, I also offer a powerful, effective worldwide custom hypnosis recording service just for LDS Dimension members for weight loss, pornography, and many other issues of concern to those in the LDS dating community (please learn more now at www.dr-rg.com/lds; email me questions to drgilchrist@yahoo.com).